Reason for living. 

Empty pillow space. This was something Lex never thought he would feel, how can some else make you feel so complete and how did he even function before without her. Without a part of himself that he can’t be without now. 

Was he missing something? 

What did she bring? 

He shook his head. He was independent and dominant, he didn’t need to feel empty when she wasn’t here, he was a full and strong individual. Or was he? 

He rolled over so he was taking up all of the space on the bed but as he look up to see her clothes hanging on the chair, he shook his head again. 

Was he afraid? 

No. Surely not. She was the last thing on his mind a year ago and now she’s the only thing on his mind.

Lex jumped out of bed just as Boh came through the door and chucked “bad isn’t it,” he said but Lex didn’t smiled. 

“I’ve never seen someone fight being in love so badly. What do you think is going to happen to you?” Boh questioned as his friend got dressed with a stern look on his face. 

“She’s a weakness,” Lex told Boh but he did as he usually did and laughed at his friends dim view.  

“Or she’s a reason for living,” he finished before leaving Lex to think about what he had said. 

Henry and Jake.

This isn’t part of Lex and the moon but I seem to be writing more of the Apex divison so I thought I would put some on here. 

********* 

Jake slowly turned to face Henry who was red and sweaty. Henry shook his head and tried to act like Jake wasn’t looking at him, he could feel him though and not on the outside. 

Henry had never felt a pull like it before. He didn’t want to believe Jake’s story, that he could make a difference. That he could be some else, less of a criminal and more of a hero but inside he knew Jake was telling the truth. 

Jake had an expression that echoed recent pain, an inner pain that made everything he said genuine and Henry liked that level of honesty. Jake wasn’t about to give into Henry though, he wanted Henry to come with him but wasn’t going to beg. Henry also liked that, it showed that he was still a free man. 

The fact was however Henry wasn’t a free man, he was wanted by the police and in serious trouble. He needed Jake to be free and Jake knew that, he didn’t use it against Henry, he wanted Henry to come because he wanted too. 

“Why should I come?” Henry said which made Jake laugh. 

“If I’m being honest, I didn’t want to go either, why should you leave your own little bubble right? Because Henry, you can be more than this,” Jake told Henry with another genuine glance that confused him. 

“I can’t,” Henry replied putting his head down and beginning to walk away. Jake became frustrated but swallowed it down so he could do the right thing. Jake took a breath. He walked over slamming the door, Henry couldn’t leave and Jake was standing toe to toe with him.

“I know you can feel it. You need to come with me because life with never feel whole again without my animal around yours but you wouldn’t want to admit that weakness would you? You’ve been fighting with people so long that you are even fighting with yourself. This isn’t you Henry. I can’t feel that. You’re a good man don’t let the bad things you have done overshadow that,” Jake explained without begging, without shouting, he held it together. 

“Wow, that was a good speech, were did you learn to motivate people like that?” Henry smiled telling Jake but Jake didn’t smile back, he walked away saying “I had an amazing big brother once.” 

In that moment Henry began to understand why Jake was trying to be his friend over his recruiter. Jake was missing something that only Henry could provide. Brotherhood. 

Forget. 

The cold wind skimmed across Lex’s face in a wonderful dance of fullness. A dance in which reminded Lex he was alive. The chill tickled his nose, nipping at it slightly before rushing to its next victim. 

It’s next victim was the tree’s, the trees which shook with fear in the wind allowing it to circle them and steal their leaves. Allowing it to leave them bare and vounrable however the trees still stood tall no matter how vounrable and bare they felt. 

The moment Lex transformed the chill ran away and his warm fur cuddled him. The heat chased away the cold and vounrability and the bare feeling he felt as a man. But he knew that was actually his problem. 

The trees managed to change their exterior every year yet managing to retain their beauty and knowledge throughout. Lex though about the man he needed to be and how he needed to be that man whom could transform on the outside but stay strong and bold on the inside. 

Lex then laughed at himself, how could he be comparing himself to a tree and then he began to think. He shouldn’t be comparing himself to anyone. 

He needed to forget that man that he didn’t become. The man that he wasn’t. Becoming the man that Destiny would want to spend her life with. A man that wasn’t afraid and upset on the inside but healed and strong.

******

Lex is the moon. 

Destiny watched him move. She watched as his perfect body proudly pranced down the side of the river and towards the fall. She watched as his confidence made the world feel little and shy. 

She watched as the moon followed him like a spotlight, showing off its beautiful creature of the dark. The Wolf that would only dance in the night. the moons perfect creation embodied in one soul, that soul being Lex. 

His heart was heavy like the moon, his charm and character only showing in the darkest of times. He was complicated like the moon, only one person ever understood him. Destiny knew that April would be the only one to ever understand her brother but she also knew he was slowly giving into her. 

The amazing man who watching the moon and for a moment when the breeze was just right, it felt like the moon was watching him back. 

*********

Not quite ready. 

As he stroked his hand down her naked back, he thought about what they had come here to do and knew she wasn’t ready. Getting up and putting his own clothes back on, watching her innocent face sleep. He knew there was no harm in keeping her innocent for a little longer. 

As Lex transformed he ran down the streem and through the trees but he wasn’t alone. The scent of a young male Wolf was in the air but it wasn’t a dangerous smell, the little Wolf was looking for someone. 

As he appeared and transformed into his human self, Lex was taken back. He had never seen such a beautiful man. Only about twenty, he was tall and his body rippled with muscles, long golden hair tide neatly into a bun and striking royal blue eyes. He was a vision. But as Lex collected himself and transformed back, a little voice spoke from behind him. 

“Honour?” Destiny’s tired voice said and her long lost brother stepped a little closer. He watched Lex but wasn’t afraid, he was looking to see who had been chosen for his sister and Lex didn’t blame him. 

Honour and Destiny stood side by side and Lex bathed in both of their beautiful glow. It was the first time Lex had felt special in being chosen for her. What a lineage the family must have, looking at the male Wolf. But Destiny was not as pleased to see her brother as he was to see her. 

Honour was happy, his sister was unharmed and still innocent. That meant Lex hadn’t been too forceful with her. For Destiny however that meant she had failed to mate and was still an unattached female. The sadness in her eyes caught Lex’s attention and he remembered what he was thinking earlier, he was wrong. She is ready. It was maybe him who was  holding the couple back. 

********

Perspective 

As Lex watch Destiny walk slowly through the clear steam and smelt the fresh air. He thought about why he was running and gained huge perspective. 

She was beautiful in the moon light, it shined on her making her look angelic and spiritual. She shone like the blessing she was and he gained perspective. 

The wind was cold but comforting. It was still blowing and still constant. The moon was a reminder that the world was still turning and he gained perspective. 

Lex began to realise that everything that he was feeling in his head was ruining how he was feeling in his heart. He needed to forgive and forget but also let life take its own course, let people make thier own choices and let himself be free from feeling for overs. 

Perspective is personal. 

But she was able to show him by just existing and that is why he loved her.
*******

Destiny goes home. 

Lex nervously twitched as he drove the long road, all the way from the lake district down to Dover. 

Destiny was from Dover, and she was excited to go home. They weren’t however going to meet her family, she didn’t want to see them, she had grown up and grown away from her parents. They didn’t call or text, they had only once spoken to her since she had moved in with Lex and that was to ask if she was pregnant yet. When she wasn’t, they were disappointed. 

Destiny slept in the passenger seat, Lex loved her company and feeling her warm breath fill the car, her dreams were silent, which was a wonderful thing. It meant she was sleeping peacefully.  

Lex felt relieved by the distance he was putting between him and Blair. Blair was a beautiful baby, he had a head full of hair already and giggled as he watch Lex move around, he enjoyed cuddles with the Alpha and usually fell asleep in his arms. It’s was too much for Lex however, knowing Blair was going to feel like he does, having to shoulder the responsibility that Lex has. It didn’t sit right. It felt uncomfortable. 

Lex tried to push Blair out of him mind however, this was about him and Destiny. They needed to have a good weekend together.